February 2009
2 posts
Singing Break-Up Telegrams
I have never heard of anyone getting a singing telegram in real life, but they seem like a cute idea: You can pay someone else to not only get whatever (likely embarrassing) message across and in song no less! Even if someone speaks a different language you can still send them a singing telegram, because music is the universal language! Even if someone is hard of hearing they can still enjoy...
December 2008
10 posts
Grizzlar Hunter
Grizzlar bears are unique hybrid animals resulting from grizzly bears mating with polar bears. Alternatively, they are known as pizzly bears although the official term is grizzlar. And they do exist, and not just in my mind. Many people think I am making stuff up when I bring up the grizzlar bear in conversation. I am flattered that anyone thinks I am that creative, but unfortunately this is...
Talk Show Host: "Grandma Peg"
Certain people have identified me as having “grandmotherly” traits. Its bad enough when your own mother says you are motherly, but having your so-called friends say you are like a grandma? That is existential crisis-worthy. No wonder I am the way that I am. It is a self-fulfilling prophecy. Maybe I never was like a grandma but being labeled grandma-like has turned me into a...
Beach Boys Cover Band
Leah, Moira and I were humming along to Good Vibrations the other day and I (it was definitely me and not one of them) thought of the of the following brilliant idea: We could form a Beach Boys cover band, called, The Beach Girls! None of us can play any instruments, except maybe the spoons, or the didgeridoo. But this is not a problem. We will be using our voices for all the instruments; Leah...
Norwegian Nanny
I have often toyed with the idea of being an au pair in Europe for a year or so. It would be very marketable to learn another language and children, much like puppies, love me. Initially I thought a country like France or Italy or Spain would be best. Ideally I would be somewhere near the Mediterranean so I could get a bronze European tan and wear sunglasses by the pool all day. Italian,...
Dog Trainer
I asked my brother what kind of skills I had that I could apply to “real life” since I don’t think I am going to have any job-related skills when I graduate with a philosophy degree. He said I was good with blacks labs (I have a black labrador who loves me) and I cooked good vegetarian things sometimes, “If you like that kind of thing.” When I was in Grade 12 I told...
